Dear Mr T,
I am writing to tell you that even though you told me I wasn’t good enough, I did it.
I started playing the piano when I was 7 years old. I was never very good but I kept trying and progressed through the grades. My main problem, as usual, I am lazy. I was too lazy to do much practice. But I had perfect pitch and a good sense of rhythm. I could, and still can, hear a tune once and then play it on the piano.
When I was 16, I was teased at ballet for being fat. I wasn’t fat, but I wasn’t super slim like the others. I danced because I enjoyed it, I didn’t want to be a professional. It knocked my confidence and I gave up. Instead I decided to learn the saxophone. Within 2 years I had passed Grade 8.
I wanted to do music GCSE but you told me I wasn’t good enough. I ignored you, took the GCSE and got an A grade. You told me I wasn’t good enough to go on and do music A-level. You were the teacher, you wore me down, I didn’t take it. I flunked my other A-levels.
When I was 17, I auditioned on the saxophone and was accepted into a band at the local Saturday music school. I progressed at a very fast rate and spent several weekends performing at various locations in London in a successful saxophone quartet. We were good. I even travelled to Cornwall to have some saxophone lessons with a famous saxophonist and composer (he wrote the theme music to the tv programme Silent Witness 🙂 )
I decided to take and gap year and study for my music A-level in one year instead of two at the local sixth form. In that year I passed the music A-level with a grade B. I wished I had never listened to you. I was accepeted into University to study a teaching degree with a specialism in music.
During my degree I excelled at musical composition and had extra lessons with a well known composer. I had the world premiere (sounds posh but that’s what they call the first performance of a new composition!) of my work in London. I passed my degree with a 2:1, scoring a 1st for my music composition element.
So Mr T, I have been wanting to tell you for a long time that you were wrong. I was good enough and I have gone on to achieve a lot with my musical talent. I am proud of myself, I didn’t give up when you told me to. I did it.
This post was written as part of the writing workshop hosted by Josie at Sleep is for the Weak using the prompt ‘Tell us about something, or show us something that you do really, really well and are proud of.’
6 comments
Louise @ WeeWifie's World says:
Mar 19, 2010
Well done you for not listening to that pathetic excuse for a teacher!! You’ve every right to be proud of your achievements – and the wish to shove it in that teachers face!
What magnificent achievements these are too! You must truly have a gift, to be able to hear music and be able to repeat it… that’s a gift, and I’m glad that you cherished it, and let it thrive – despite your so called teachers negativity. Maybe he seen your raw talent and was jealous. How pathetic of him. He should have nurtured it, and helped you make the best of this talent instead of trying to bury it.
So well done you!!
Thea says:
Mar 19, 2010
Uggg. I’m taking a drawing class right now called “drawing for the terrified” and one of the people there hasn’t taken a drawing lesson in over 40 years because a drawing teacher in high school once told her she shouldn’t waste her time trying to draw and should go do something else. And she’s drawing lovely things right now in class.
Those teachers are so infuriating! Good for you for continuing to study what you enjoy!
Ask Delia says:
Mar 19, 2010
Well done you! What a pathetic teacher, I always thought they were supposed to nurture and push their pupils not knock them down at every opportunity. I too had similar experiences, I really, really wanted to be a dietician but was told I’d never be any good as I wasn’t good enough at sciences. I just wish I had a little of your tenacity and had gone for it but its probably too late now given my age. Another teacher told me I couldn’t take O-level maths as I was hopeless so I was entered for CSE instead. I finished the exam in 20 minutes and got a Grade 1 which was equivalent to a reasonable pass at O-level.
amylane says:
Mar 20, 2010
Thank you for your lovely comments. It is so awful that a few words from someone that they will probably forget about straight away can trample on your hopes and dreams. x
Josie @Sleep is for the Weak says:
Mar 21, 2010
Oh wow! It sounds like you have a lot to be proud of, if only for overcoming such hurtful and discouraging comments. It’s not easy – these comments have a way of burrowing themselves down in our minds at effecting our outlook for a long time. You’ve been incredibly strong to overcome them – well done you!!
amylane says:
Mar 22, 2010
Thanks Josie. You’re right, it has taken me all this time to ‘get over it’. It’s amazing how someone’s negative comments will stay with you forever. x